Alone

The other day I was reminded I am alone
It was in an innocent way
two people talking and sharing
I revealed I was the youngest of 5 boys
“you must have a lot of nieces and nephews”
little did they know that 2 of my brothers are gone,
the oldest is detained and the other is just getting by
I look around at my generation and by now I should
have been partnered up for years, perhaps have a few kids
and even have that white picket fence
for the majority of my adult life
I’ve always found myself in a relationship,
my friends use to call me “the king of LTR’s”
and I was proud to carry that title
friends and dates seem to talk about the norm
of casual encounters and to this day I just don’t get it
I feel like I don’t fit in and I don’t belong
I refused to give in and go with the flow
I have to much self respect and self love
I am embarrassed with my inexperience with men
so this starts a new chapter in my life
I am preparing myself for the long haul
I am comfortable with it
I am leaning to do things alone and it doesn’t phase me
This will make me even stronger.
onger.

Heart of Hearts

In my heart of hearts
I made room just for me
for which only a place I feel
it’s my refuge of calmness, peace and shelter
it’s my gut feeling for my feelings towards the world
it only sees the good in mankind, the good in you
I believe we are all good
it’s the outside factors in society that allows us
turn in our kindness to self destructing animals
when I need reassurance about somebody
I think back to my heart of hearts and it gives
a better balance and I make the proper decision.

Perfect moment in time

Next time I see you and look into your eyes
there will be an unspoken acknowledgment
that will allow my soul to be set free
and I will kneel before you holding up my hands
presenting to you my heart in the center of my hands
making myself vulnerable but not afraid
because I love myself and I want to share this with you

Respect

I am not sure why I go
perhaps it’s the blast of over excessive marketing
crap society announces about mothers day
what about the forgotten ones who no longer have one?
I’m afraid the mighty dollar rules over the human experience
each year I make that trip, it takes me longer to get to the cemetery
then I actually stay, when I drive through the gates a sense of peace over comes me
my body and mood transcends into a calm and beautiful phase.
The flowers are in full bloom, the grounds are extremely clean
It’s amazing how we live our lives and at the end we are reduced
to memories and a plaque with some dates on it.
will people remember me or even come and visit, I doubt it
my family unit has never been solid, it started with the foundation
I live my life to the best of my ability, I stay positive, focused and strong in at the end when I surrender my soul, I would also like to be cremated and placed next to my mother
So that’s why I go, I go out of respect.

Aquarius meets Scorpio

How come it feels like I already know you?
Is it possible to miss a stranger?
It feels natural, simple and relaxing to be around you
Do you believe in destiny, faith and power of attraction?
Would you welcome the challenge of the perfect union?
Would you show me the way a perfect love should be?
Would you wipe away my tears when I need you?
Will you encourage me and respect me like I would you?
Would you tell me about your day, good or bad?
Are you ready for your most honest relationship?
Do you feed off my energy, pureness and shyness
As I would fee of your confidence, honesty and self respect
Have you realized your needs are my wants
You made me realize that for years, my heart has been surrounded by imposters
And you made me forget about everybody before, like they were practice.
Until we meet again…….

A conversation with god

I have allowed society to bleed my soul
Is it too late to be on the correct path?
my inner voice told me it’s too late
I got caught up in cosmetic superficial things
it pushed me away from my goal of being
a servant of love, peace and hope
I live my life in hope as an example to others
some days it’s too difficult
and I wouldn’t mind if I didn’t wake up in the morning
however tomorrow is another beautiful day
and I look forward to it
I never really believed in you until I believed in myself
I found myself at the same time I found you
Did you do that on purpose?

Playing with Fire

From the moment I saw you, my heart was terrorized

I felt cupid smiling upon us and I gave you exactly what you were looking for

In an undiscovered moment, I gave you my heart

I am not sure if I handed it to you or you took it

I told you I saw your soul, you said you loved my spirit

Does everyone get memorized by your brown eyes?

I’m afraid my heart will always bleed for you

Silly me, simple fool how could I fall for a boy like you

I now realize that love is a game with you and it meant nothing

I could not make you love then, how will you love me in the future?

As you move on, remember me, remember us, and remember that first night with the rose peddles as we became one

Thinking of you and us in the future, I am playing with fire

In order to move forward, I will take this fire and burn that bridge

Good bye Little Sparrow

Good bye a million times over.